Wilbon channels Bruce

A strong opening:

I hate the NFL draft. I realize that saying anything against the draft amounts to blasphemy, but somebody's got to do it. The NFL draft is the most overrated, overhyped, obsessively overcovered non-event in sports. It's a nuisance, made-for-TV-by-TV event for people who couldn't tell a left tackle from a right guard, or zone from man-to-man coverage to save their mamas' lives.

and a defense of Mel Kiper:

It's too long. It's too slow. I hate the draft, but I love Mel Kiper, even though it's largely his fault that the draft has turned into a cottage industry for way too many people. I told Kiper I was writing this column today and that even though he makes his living analyzing the draft, he had to tell me one thing he hates about it. And though he was reluctant, Kiper said: "I hate the amount of time it takes to complete the first round. Fifteen minutes for a pick? It's disgusting. It should be eight minutes [for the first round] and then five from then on. The first round takes six hours. The first round lasts as long as a [Tony Kornheiser] bus ride across the country."

with a bit of the same lament that I made:

My problem is what the NFL draft doesn't tell us. The draft never even hinted to us that Tom Brady, chosen in the sixth round, was going to lead a team to three Super Bowls. The NFL draft never told us that Terrell Davis, also chosen in the sixth round, was going to lead the Broncos to back-to-back Super Bowl titles. It never told us Kurt Warner was going to lead the Rams to a pair of Super Bowl appearances because Warner was never even drafted. It never told us Brad Johnson, a ninth-round pick, was going to win more Super Bowls than Dan Marino.

And then there's stuff we never should have listened to. For instance, the draft told us the combination of Shuler (No. 3 overall) to Michael Westbrook (No. 4 overall) would be leading the Redskins to one playoff appearance after another. The draft told us that Ryan Leaf, Akili Smith, Tim Couch and Cade McNown were going to be studs.

The point I'm trying to make is this: Who knew?

Sometimes the picks pan out, sometimes they don't.

and then the finale, with which we all can agree (we can, can't we?)

While I'm at it, the only thing I hate nearly as much as the NFL draft is "American Idol." Actually, I don't hate "Idol" because I don't watch it. I hate it because people care so stinkin' much about it, because occasionally somebody has to look at the direction in which the popular culture is moving and simply rebel!

An impressive effort from Wilbon, who moved down my personal draft board due to overexposure, but in this column expresses a glint of the promise that once made him a high first round selection.